【題目】書面表達(dá)

臨近期末，學(xué)校將在學(xué)習(xí)小組內(nèi)開展年終自評(píng)和組評(píng)活動(dòng)，假如你是Moonlight小組的組長(zhǎng)，請(qǐng)根據(jù)下面表格中的提示，用英語(yǔ)寫一篇短文，對(duì)你的組員Jerry進(jìn)行評(píng)價(jià)。

Name

Jerry (一個(gè)十五歲的初三學(xué)生)。

Characteristics

聰明、勤奮、大方、樂于助人。

Hobbies

看科幻小說(shuō)；看體育節(jié)目。

Study

大部分精力投放到學(xué)習(xí)中……

Ability

擅長(zhǎng)跑步，校運(yùn)會(huì)第一名。

Honour

會(huì)講故事，能寫出好的小說(shuō)，獲得最佳小作者獎(jiǎng)（Award for Best young writers）。

Problems

面臨考試感到壓力，缺少睡眠。

Your suggestions

自擬

注意： 1．詞數(shù)：90詞左右，開頭已經(jīng)寫好，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)。

2．句子結(jié)構(gòu)準(zhǔn)確，要點(diǎn)齊全，內(nèi)容合理，篇章結(jié)構(gòu)連貫。

3．表達(dá)中不得出現(xiàn)真實(shí)的地名、校名和人名。

Jerry is a member of my team called Moonlight._________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________

【答案】

Jerry is a member of my team called Moonlight. Everyone in our group likes him very much because he is smart and hard-working. It’s also generous of him to share things with us. He often helps us when we are in trouble.

In his free time， he not only likes reading science fiction but also likes watching programmes about sports. But since this term， he has devoted most of time to study and has made great progress.

He is good at sports， especially running. He came first in the race of school sports meeting this year. He is such a good storyteller that he can write exciting novels. Because of this， he was presented with “Award for Best young writers”.

But recently， he has got some problems. He suffers from the coming exams. He feels so stressed that he can’t sleep well at night. I think that he worries too much and should arrange his time well so that he can achieve the confidence and pass the exams successfully. I hope you think my advice is worth taking.

【解析】

試題分析：這篇作文要求我們按照表格里的內(nèi)容介紹一下Jerry的情況，為Jerry寫一篇綜合素質(zhì)的評(píng)價(jià)報(bào)告。在表格中有非常詳細(xì)的關(guān)于Jerry各方面的內(nèi)容，我們需要用正確的英語(yǔ)把這些內(nèi)容有條理的表達(dá)出來(lái)。表格中涉及的內(nèi)容較多，寫作時(shí)要注意表達(dá)的條理性。這篇作文應(yīng)主要使用第三人稱來(lái)寫。在最后要給Jerry提一些建議，這一部分應(yīng)該用第一人稱。同時(shí)注意表達(dá)的準(zhǔn)確性，尤其是表格中的第五項(xiàng)和第六項(xiàng)內(nèi)容。

寫作亮點(diǎn)：這是一篇比較優(yōu)秀的范文。這篇作文內(nèi)容完整，包含了表格中的所有內(nèi)容，沒有遺漏要點(diǎn)。表達(dá)準(zhǔn)確，注意了被動(dòng)形式的使用，如He was rewarded by our school this year.。寫作時(shí)注意了條理性，使文章具有層次感，條理清楚。短文注意到了長(zhǎng)短句的結(jié)合，并恰當(dāng)?shù)氖褂昧艘恍┻B詞，使文章表達(dá)的連貫。如He is always ready to help others.、He not only likes reading detective novels but also likes watching programs about sports news.、He is good at running. He won the first place in our school sports meeting this year.等。

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