Question

4．隨著期末考試臨近，許多家長用金錢、旅游等承諾鼓勵孩子努力學(xué)習(xí)，以后考入好大學(xué)．假定你是高二學(xué)生李華，請根據(jù)所提供的有關(guān)信息，給某英文報社寫封短信．
內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)：
 1．許多家長用金錢、旅游等承諾鼓勵孩子努力學(xué)習(xí)，以后考入好大學(xué)；
   2．可能會導(dǎo)致學(xué)生只關(guān)注物質(zhì)獎勵，而減少學(xué)習(xí)樂趣；
   3．一旦獲得想要的獎勵就失去了學(xué)習(xí)動力；
   4．你的建議．
注意：
    1．不要逐詞逐句地翻譯．
     2．為使語句連貫，可以適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)．
     3．詞數(shù)100左右．短信開頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不計入總數(shù)．
Dear Editor，?                 
 With the final examination approaching，
                                             
Yours truly，
Li Hua．

Answer 1

分析 本書面表達(dá)是一篇提綱類書面表達(dá)．第一步：審題．分析題目和提綱可知，這封書信的體裁應(yīng)該是議論文．論點(diǎn)是"家長用金錢，旅游等承諾鼓勵孩子努力學(xué)習(xí)是不確當(dāng)?shù)?，陳述要點(diǎn)并說明理由．因文章需要發(fā)表自己的意見，故使用第一人稱．第二步：構(gòu)思．文章應(yīng)該按照"總--分--總"的結(jié)構(gòu)分為三段．考生在寫作之前必修認(rèn)真審題，首先要注意文章的時態(tài)．不能根據(jù)材料逐字逐句的翻譯應(yīng)該注意句子的銜接，以提高作文的檔次．
【亮點(diǎn)說明】文中使用了非常好的短語和句子為文章增色不少，比如encourage sb．to do，be admitted into，achieve the goal，focus on，instead of，as soon as，make sb．a(chǎn)ware of；還運(yùn)用句型with引導(dǎo)的復(fù)合結(jié)構(gòu)，同位語從句．并注意了句子的銜接如：once，firstly，secondly，however，besides 等等．
They promise that they will be rewarded with things such as money，traveling and so on once they achieve the goals．運(yùn)用了賓語從句； Firstly，it may lead to the fact that children's attention will focus on such things instead of the pleasure of studying．Secondly，they may stop working hard as soon as they get what they want．這句話表現(xiàn)出了文章的層次性；

解答 Dear Editor，?
      With the final examination approaching，many parents try to encourage their children to study hard and be admitted into a famous university in the near future．（高分句型一）They promise that they will be rewarded with things such as money，traveling and so on once they achieve the goals．（高分句型二）
      However，I don't think this is a proper way．Firstly，it may lead to the fact that children's attention will focus on such things instead of the pleasure of studying．（高分句型三）Secondly，they may stop working hard as soon as they get what they want．?
      I think a wise way is to make us aware of the importance of going to a good university．We should also study hard and well for our future．
                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Yours truly，
                                                                                                                                                                                                                               Li Hua

點(diǎn)評 英語寫作是一項(xiàng)主觀性較強(qiáng)的測試題．它不僅考查學(xué)生的寫作基礎(chǔ)而且還考查學(xué)生在寫作過程中綜合運(yùn)用語言的能力．在撰寫時要注意主謂語一致，時態(tài)呼應(yīng)，用詞貼切等．要提高英語寫作水平，需要兩方面的訓(xùn)練：一是語言基礎(chǔ)方面的訓(xùn)練，要有扎實(shí)的造句、翻譯等基本功，即用詞法、句法等知識造出正確無誤的句子；二是寫作知識和能力 方面的訓(xùn)練以掌握寫作方面的基本方法和技巧．