Question

假設你是李華，幾天前你從某國外網(wǎng)站購買了一支錄音筆，現(xiàn)在你發(fā)電子郵件到該網(wǎng)站反映以下問題：

音質(zhì)不太清楚；2.操作不簡便；3.經(jīng)常出問題。期待的解決辦法：(1)退貨退款；(2)修理或調(diào)換。

注意：1.字數(shù)120-150，開頭結(jié)尾不計入總字數(shù)； 2.可適當增加細節(jié)，試行文連貫；

3.參考詞匯 錄音筆 recording pen

Dear Sir or Madam,

 

 

 

Best wishes,

Yours, Li Hua

 

Answer 1

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to tell you something about the recording pen. I bought it from your website several days ago. However, there seems to be something wrong with it. First, the voice isn’t so clear as you claimed. Second, it’s not easy to operate, which has caused me much trouble. What I expect is a human-friendly one. Third, it often breaks down , while a recording pen at such a price shouldn’t have had so many problems.

Due to its poor quality and much inconvenience it has caused, I wonder whether you can do something about it. I would appreciate it very much if I can get my money back. I’ll send it back to you as soon as you return the money to me. If it can’t be helped, I wish you could have it repaired or changed.

I’m looking forward to your early reply.

Best wishes,

Yours, Li Hua

【解析】

試題分析：

題目要求發(fā)電子郵件反映遇到的問題。寫作要點包括：音質(zhì)不清；操作繁瑣；經(jīng)常出問題；期待的解決辦

法：退貨退款；修理或更換。詞數(shù)在120-150之間，開頭不計入總詞數(shù)，可以適當拓展作文內(nèi)容，但要保證

行文的連貫；使用上參考詞匯。

亮點說明：首句I am writing to tell you something about the recording pen.點明意圖；

范文注意使用However, First, Second, Third等連接上下文，表示列舉，使作文層次分明、條理清晰；

范文使用了定語從句which has caused me much trouble，it has caused；情態(tài)動詞和虛擬語氣shouldn’t have had so many problems；主語從句What I expect；賓語從句whether you can do something about it；固定句型I would appreciate it very much if I can get my money back.；條件句If it can’t be helped；固定搭配have it repaired or changed；固定句型I’m looking forward to your early reply.等，使作文句式豐富，增強了說服力；

范文還使用了so clear as，breaks down，due to，send it back to，as soon as等短語和固定搭配，使作文內(nèi)容得到充實。

考點：書信類作文