【題目】手機本來是方便聯(lián)系的,但是很多年輕人卻將手機當成消磨時間的娛樂工具。他們整天低頭發(fā)微信、玩游戲,被人們戲稱為“低頭族”。請為Campus Life寫一篇文章,對這種情況進行分析,并發(fā)表你的看法,文章中需包括下面的要點:

1.人們對手機產(chǎn)生依賴,疏遠家人和親友;

2.低頭玩手機甚至引發(fā)交通事故,給家人帶來痛苦。

注意:1.詞數(shù)120~150;

2.可以適當增加細節(jié),以使行文連貫。

3.參考詞匯:低頭族Smartphone Addicts

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【答案】It is a common sight to see many young people engaged in emailing, twittering or chatting using their smartphones, which might be the best choice to kill time when they are on dull journey.

They are called Smartphone Addicts, who are buried in using their smartphones or laptops without raising their heads. This is very harmful. On the one hand, they keep away from their friends or family. On the other hand, being busy with their smartphones can cause accidents, which brings them more pains than pleasure.

As a matter of fact, they can take up reading to kill the time during their trips. Reading books or newspapers can also enrich their knowledge. The pleasure from reading is a pleasant experience they can't have from using smartphones.

【解析】這是一篇提綱類作文。文章內(nèi)容要點已經(jīng)給出?忌趯戇@篇文章時,要注意以下幾點:

1.本篇以現(xiàn)如今低頭族現(xiàn)象普遍為話題展開論述。通篇應該以一般將來時與現(xiàn)在時態(tài)為主。

2. 要點要齊全。闡明觀點并指出過度沉溺于手機的危害,同時提出相應的解決方法。但是不要對要點進行簡單的羅列?梢允褂眠m當?shù)倪B接詞,使上下文行文流暢,銜接自然流程。

3.根據(jù)要點,先組此句;句式豐富,避免單詞。

【范文亮點】

文章采用了“On the one hand...on the other hand一方面...另一方面、As a matter of fact實際上等連接詞,使上下文行文流暢,銜接自然流程。

“It is a common sight to see many young people engaged in emailing, twittering or chatting using their smartphones, which might be the best choice to kill time when they are on dull journey.” which引導的非限制性定語從句。

“They are called Smartphone Addicts, who are buried in using their smartphones or laptops without raising their heads”who引導定語從句.

文章中使用了“engage in從事于、keep away from遠離...、be busy with忙于...、take up開始

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