Funny English Errors and Insights
Laugh... And Learn!
Welcome tothe website for Funny English Errors and Insights (2010), a new book of unconscious humour published by the National Library of Australia.
Funny English Errors and Insights will be launched at the National Library in Canberra on 29th, October 2010.
In the meantime, explore this website for other collections of real-life English language mistakes,including funny answers to exam questions, media misprints, and silly signs.
See Funny English Errors: The B List for more than a hundred examples of funny English gaffes(失言). For more funny English errors, read author Troy Simpson's blog. For still more examples,, join this website to download a free PDF version of English As She Is Taught, which lists our top 250 funny English language mistakes from that classic howlers book.
Join this website FREE, and you can also:
o  Enter member-only competitions
o  Contribute your comments
o  Download free e-Cards
o  Be the first to know about our much-anticipated book, Funny English Errors and Insights (2010) ...
Features
Follows in the tradition of the runaway best-seller Howlers books of the 1920s and 1930s
o  Includes quotes(引文) that have never been published before in this way
o  Includes more than 30 carefully selected funny photos
o  Topics include English, science, history, geography, religion, mathematics, and more
o  A perfect gift for students, teachers, parents, grandparents, public speakers, doctors, lawyers, journalists, clergy and religious, and anyone with a sense of humour!
小題1:The word launched in the second paragraph is closest to the meaning:
A.sent up for the first time.B.written for the first time.
C.for sale for the first time.D.printed for the first time.
小題2:On the website ,you can do the following things except     .         
A.read some funny news
B.know something about this book previously
C.find a lot of examples about English errors
D.express your opinions freely
小題3:About this book, you know that       .
A.it only includesEnglish, science, history
B.it is quite different from Howlers books
C.a(chǎn)ll the quotes in it are familiar with us
D.it is intended for people all walks of life
小題4:The text is aimed at introducing      .
A.a(chǎn) popular websiteB.some selected funny photos
C.a(chǎn) new bookD.some funny English errors
                                     

小題1:C
小題2:A
小題3:D
小題4:C
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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解


    Our fly-away vacation have been created with American visitors in mind.
    For one, we have made getting to Europe easy. Systemwide, we serve nine European cities. From New York, we fly nonstop to Paris, Frankfurt and Zurich, with continuing service to Geneva.
    Second, we have designed these vacation package tours the way Americans like to travel. We have picked hotels that give you the flavor of Europe while providing real value for your money.
    We Americans have always like making up our own minds. We have tours by escorted (護(hù)衛(wèi))motor coach or your own rental car. And land packages in Paris that start as low as $ 299—$1289.
    Another advantage of our fly-away vacations is that they are at a set US price. You needn’t worry about the changes in European currency. Then there is our fly-away vacation warranty. It’s your assurance that Americans stand behind your fly-away vacations.
    You will find all the details of our warranty and of our European fly-away vacations in two free color brochures. Just call your travel agent or America toll-free at (800) 433-7300 to get yours.
    * Restrictions:Price is valid through 10/31/88 and is per person based on double occupancy for 6 nights. Price is subject to change without notice and does not include air fare, taxes or surcharges. Hotel subject to availability on certain dates. Warranty details available upon request.
    11.In which section of the newspaper can you find this passage?
    A. Entertainment.         B. News.               C. Advertisement.          D. Sports.
    12.Which is not the advantage according to the passage?
    A. Make it easy to Europe.                         B. Easy to get travelling information.
    C. No changeable US price.                        D. Different ways to tour.
    13.What does the underlined word “warranty” in Paragraph five mean?
    A. Introduction.            B. Notice.              C. Suggestion.                     D. Promise.
    14.Which of the following is TRUE according to the passage?
    A. The price of the fly-away vacation is fixed.
    B. Price is always valid, so you do not need to worry.
    C. During the tour, there is no other type of tours.
    D. There are only a few stops during the tour.
    15.What is the best title of this passage?
    A. Go shopping in Europe.                         B. The beautiful scenes of Europe.
    C. How to take a plane.                              D. Travelling around Europe.

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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解


    WILD WEATHERMAN
    Name: Sam Champion
    Hot job: TV Weatherman
    Where: WABC-TV, New York City
    When you were a child, did you plan to forecast wind, rain, and snow on TV?
    I wanted to be a foreign journalist.I took courses in weather science at Eastern Kentucky University, but I majored in broadcasting news.
    How did you finally become a weatherman?
    My first job in the early 80’s was at the local TV station in Paducah, Kentucky.I did everything from turning on the lights in the morning to writing and delivering morning news.I put together weather forecasts, and became interested in them.
    Back then, how did you forecast weather?
    Independent companies collected computer information that showed, for example, how a single weather system might split into snow or snow mixed with rain.The information was often opposite and the job of a weatherman was to study the information and make the best educated guess about the storm.
    Has weather forecasting changed much with new technology?
    Advanced computers, satellites, and Doppler radar (sound waves used to track storms) have made forecasting more exact.But we still know very little about how weather is shaped.So far, we just have theories.
    Any advice for children who’d like to become weather scientists?
    To me, weather is the most exciting field in the world.There are still so many more questions about weather than answers.After all, if we can’t foresee floods or hurricanes, how safe a society are we? Weather forecasting is wide open for scientists who love to solve puzzling problems.The next generation of meteorologists (weather scientists) will unlock many of Earth’s weather secrets.So get a general knowledge of Earth science, and study meteorology (weather science) in college.
    Thanks, Sam.                                
    1.Judging from the writing style, the text is ________.
    A.a(chǎn) diary   B.a(chǎn)n interview     C.a(chǎn) news story     D.a(chǎn)n announcement
    2.As a child, ABC-TV’s Sam Champion wanted to be a ________.
    A.space scientist  B.weatherman     C.news reporter   D.meteorologist
    3.Present weather forecasting technology ________.
    A.has made weather report more exact than ever            
    B.is still not perfect
    C.hasn’t changed much in the last 50 years                           
    D.both A and B
    4.The study of weather science is called ________.
    A. meteorology   B. forecasting    C .geography      D. earth science

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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解


    Register(注冊(cè)) in person
    Register by phone
    Register by mail
    1781 N. Winchester ST.
    Call 264  8833
    Use form given
    Chicago
    Basic Photography
    This is an eight-hour course for beginners who want to learn how to use a 35mm camera. The teacher will cover such areas as kinds of film, light, and lenses(鏡頭). Bring your own 35mm camera to the class.
    Course Charge: $150
    Jan. 10, 12, 17, 19, Tues. & Thurs. 6-8p.m.
    Marianne Adams is a professional photographer whosephotographs appear in many magazines.
    Understanding Computers
    This twelve-hour course is for people who don’t know very much about computers, but who need to learn about them. You will learn what computers are, what they can and can’t do, and how to use them.
    Course Charge: $75
    Equipment Charge: $10
    Jan. 7, 14, 21, 28, Sat. 9-12 a.m.
    Joseph Saimders is a professor of computer science at New Urban University. He has over twelve years of experience in the computer field.
    Stop Smoking
    Do you want to stop smoking? Have you already tried to stop and failed? Now it is the time to stop smoking using the latest methods. You can stop smoking, and this twelve-hour course will help you do it.
    Course Charge: $30
    Jan. 4, 11, 18, 25 Mon. 4-7 p.m.
    Dr.John Goode is a practicing psychologist(心理學(xué)家)who has helped hundreds of people stop smoking.
    Typing
    This course on weekdays is for those who want to type as well as those who want to improve their typing. You are tested in the first class and practice at one of eight different skill levels. This allows you to learn at your own speed. Each program lasts 20 hours. Bring your own paper.
    Course Charge: $125
    Materials Charge: $25
    Two hours each evening for two weeks.
    This course is taught by a number of business education teachers who have successfully taught typing courses before.
    55. The word “professional” in this advertisement most probably means “_____”.
    A. spiritual       B. journalist    C. professor         D. experienced 
    56. The shortest course is _____.
    A. Basic Photography                B. Understanding Computers
    C. Stop Smoking                    D. Typing
    57. There are typing courses_____.
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    C. from Monday to Saturday   D. on each day in the week
    58. If you can have free time only on weekends, you should take the course _________.
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    C. Stop Smoking                    D. Typing

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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解


    第三部分閱讀理解(共20小題,每小題2分,滿分40分)
    閱讀下列短文,從每題所給的四個(gè)選項(xiàng)A、B、C、D中,選出最佳選項(xiàng),并在答題卡上將該項(xiàng)涂黑。
    A

    BUY NOWat ticket office
    Online Bookings:WWW. urbtix.hk
    Credit Card Telephone Bookings: 2111 5999
    WWW.hk.artsfestival.org

     
    The Hong Kong Arts Festival is made possible with the funding support of:
                       
    The Hong Kong Jockey Club Charities Trust    Leisure and Cultural Services Department
    The Organizers reserve the right to substitute artists and change programme details
    should unavoidable circumstances render it necessary
     

     
    56. How many days will the two jazz masters perform in Hong Kong?
    A. 2 days.        B. 3 days.           C. 4 days.        D. 5 days.
    57. You can get a ticket except that ________.
    A. you go and buy one at the ticket office             B. you book online
    C. you call and pay with your credit card              D. you wait to get one for free
    58. Why will the two jazz masters perform in Hong Kong?
    A. Because they meet in there after not seeing each other for 40 years.
    B. It’s for Hong Kong Arts Festival.
    C. Because they can’t live without music.
    D. It just happens that they two are performing there.

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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解

    Attend the Next Forum!
    For the last fourteen years CPSB has had the pleasure of hosting a learning event we call a Forum. We started offering programs in Sarasota in February in 1991 and our first Forum was held in 1992 as a small group meeting. Being from the Northern USA, this was a particularly good time to go south for the warmth of our friendship with Dr. Treffinger and Dr. Noller and to keep away from the cold winter.
    The Forum is the only chance to learn about various topics of the creativity and innovation (革新)and from those who have rich experience and interest in the field. The theme of the 2005 Forum includes searching for a few new methods, sharing lessons from experience, and learning and exchange ideas on cutting-edge research. Space is limited, so early registration (登記)is welcome.
    Meeting the Innovation Challenge
    February 6 and 7,2005  Lido Holiday Inn
    Sarasota, Florida
    $ 750 (registration includes some meals and materials)
    Interested in becoming qualified to use the VIEW assessment (評(píng)估)of Problem Solving Style? The two days just before our Forum provides you just that chance. For more information on VIEW see pages 24-25.
    VIEW Qualification Course
    February 4 and 5, 2005 Lido Holiday Inn
    Sarasota, Florida
    $650 (registration includes lunch and course materials)
    Special Offer: If you would like to attend the VIEW qualification course and the Forum, you can register for both events for $ 1050.
    63. According to this advertisement, at the Forum people _______.
    A. come together in order to form an organization
    B. express different opinions and discuss public matters
    C. eat together to celebrate their success or victory
    D. work together for the purpose of business or trade
    64. If you register both the VIEW qualification course and the Forum at the same time, you will save _______.
    A. $100
    B. $300
    C. $350
    D. $400
    65. The underlined sentence “Space is limited, so early registration is welcome” means ______.
    A. space is limited, so you can’t register now
    B. space is too limited for you to register
    C. you’ll lose the good chance if you don’t register soon
    D. you’ll be given a special offer if you register now
    66. The main purpose of this advertisement is to ______.
    A. encourage more people to attend the Forum in time
    B. promise everyone can pay less money to attend the Forum
    C. call on the people in the north of the USA to go south for holidays
    D. introduce some new activities and topics of the Forum

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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解


    E
    What to do if you don't feel popular?
    ●Try to take part in activities. Call your friends. Plan to do something. The worst feeling is staying home alone, because it makes you feel even more lonely.
    ●Try to make new friends. Choose friends carefully, not just because you think they're popular. And remember, making good friends takes time. Choosing a popular person to be friends with is okay. If they are nice. 
    ●Be yourself(保持獨(dú)立). If you want to become friends with someone who's popular, don't make yourself into someone you are not just to impress that person.
    ●Be nice. Be friendly. Be outgoing(開(kāi)朗的). But don't overdo it!Talk to trusted friends if you are feeling really bad. Or you might want to write it down in a journal(期刊)or diary.
    ●Do something special for yourself. You could take pictures of your friends, or collect their school pictures, and take a collage(拼貼畫)to hang on your wall. This will remind(提醒)you, when you are feeling unpopular, that you really do have friends.
    ●Think up your own ideas. These suggestions might not work for everyone.
    What to do if you have a problem with your teacher?
    ●Talk to your parents, or another adult who will listen to you and perhaps can help. Talk to your friends. Maybe they have had problems with the same teacher, too.
    ●Don't give the teacher a reason to have problems with you. Do your work, complete your task, attend the class seriously and take notes. Maybe you just need to give the teacher a chance(機(jī)會(huì)).
    ●Try to find out what the problem is.
    ●Talk to the teacher if you feel comfortable doing this. Don't be nasty(鬧別扭的), but express your concerns(關(guān)心). Listen to the teacher, as well.
    ●Just accept the fact that you're not going to love all your teachers.
    72、What do we mean by saying“ not feeling popular?”
    A、Not liked by our classmates or workmates.    B、Not doing what we want.
    C、Not showing any interest in anything.        D、Not so happy.
    73、What does the underlined word “overdo” mean?
    A、Do something too much or in an extreme way.     B、Try your best to do something.
    C、Do something carefully.                     D、Work too hard.
    74、The writer __________.
    A、believes that your friend will help you out if you take their pictures
    B、suggests that you discuss the reason of problem with your teacher when you feel uncomfortable
    C、wants you to know that students usually hates teachers
    D、is not too sure if his advice will certainly work on you
    75、What's the best title of this passage?
    A、Why We Have Problems at School?    
    B、Always be Yourself.
    C、How to Handle Problems at School?
    D、Don't Be Afraid of Problems With Others.

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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解

    Welcome to Language upon Thames. This brochure has been designed to give you an overview of our Language School and the courses we offer. If you have some additional questions please do not hesitate to contact us for more information.
    At Language upon Thames,we feel it is important to be flexible,in order that students can decide what period of study suits them best.
    Small Group General English Courses
    These courses are aimed at students who wish to improve their speaking,listening,reading and writing skills and are offered at the following levels:
    BEGINNERS
    ELEMENTARY(初級(jí))
    PRE-1NTERMEDLATE
    UPPER-INTERMEDLATE
    Studying one of the above courses will enable you to use English more confidently and competently on a daily basis.
    Try our free online test to see which level you are at—CLICK HERE.
    Exam Courses
    These courses ale aimed at students who wish to gain academic qualifications in English and are offered at the following levels:
    University of Cambridge exams:
    ADVANCED l — FCE (First certificate)
    ADVANCED 2一CAE (Advanced)
    ADVANCED 3一CPE (Proficiency)
    Studying one of the above courses will enable you to continue your education or enter university in this country. (Students wishing to gain admission to a British university are normally required to have the Cambridge Proficiency Certificate.)
    Speaking, Listening & Pronunciation
    This course builds on communicative confidence and competence and is aimed at students who wish to develop the important skills of speaking and listening.
    Emphasis is also placed on pronunciation,with activities designed to meet the needs of students of different nationalities,who need to focus on different areas.
    CLICK HERE to register for a General English course.
    Other Languages
    At Language upon Thames we offer a wide range of cafeterias,restaurants,shops and bars. Most importantly,we have foreign language classes of French,Japanese,German,Spanish and Italian during the day,evening or on a one-to-one basis.
    68. What does this passage mainly talk about?
    A. English courses.
    B. Ways to improve students’ English.
    C. The best way to improve your skills.
    D. The importance of English.
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    B. deal with everyday English well
    C. . have better pronunciation of English
    D. be able to continue your education or enter university in this country
    70. Judging from the description,we can tell that this passage must be taken from     .
    A. a newspaper        B. a magazine
    C. . the Internet            D. a guidebook
    71. The following statements are true EXCEPT     .
    A. Only Englishmen can attend the courses.
    B. The courses are designed for learners of different levels.
    C. . One can learn French even in the evening.
    D. Language upon Thames is a school aimed to offer help with language learning.

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    科目:高中英語(yǔ) 來(lái)源:不詳 題型:閱讀理解


    (B)
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    Cover Price: $ 59.88
    Price: $19.95 ($1.66/issue)
    You Save: $ 39.93 (67%)
    Issues: 12 issues / 12 months
    Self
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    Cover Price: $35.86
    Price: $15.00 ($2.5 / issue)
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    Issues: 10 issues / 12 months
    Instyle
    Instyle is a guide to the lives and lifestyles of the world’s famous people. The magazine covers the choices people make about their homes, their clothes and their free time activities. With photos and articles, it opens the door to these people’s homes, families, parties and weddings, offering ideas about beauty, fitness and in general, lifestyles. Publisher: The Time Inc. Magazine Company.
    Cover Price: $47.88
    Price: $23.88 ($2.38 / issue)
    You Save: $24.00 (50%)
    Issues: 10 issues / 12 months
    Wired
    This magazine is designed for leaders in the field of information engineering including top managers and professionals in the computer, business, design and education industries. Published by Conde Nast Publications Inc., Wired often carries articles on how technology changes people’s lives.
    Cover Price: $59.40
    Price: $10.00 ($1.00 / issue)
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    Issues: 10 issues / 12 months
    46. Which of the following magazines is published monthly?    
    A. Discover.         B. Self.                     C. Instyle.                 D. Wired.
    47. Which two magazines are published by the same publisher?
    A. Wired and Instyle.                            B. Discover and Instyle.
    C. Self and Discover.                             D. Self and Wired.
    48. Which magazine offers the biggest price cut?
    A. Instyle.            B. Wired.                  C. Discover.               D. Self.
    49. The “Style Lab” in Self provides readers with articles which ______.
    A. offer advice to ordinary women on clothes
    B. show how a woman can become famous
    C. introduce places with the best food
    D. discuss ways of training models
    50. Those who are interested in management and the use of high technology would probably choose ______.
    A. Instyle.            B. Self.                     C. Wired.                  D. Discover.

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