Question

【題目】假設(shè)你是李華，你的加拿大筆友Daniel來(lái)信向你求助。他最近和媽媽鬧矛盾，因?yàn)閶寢尣蛔屗�過(guò)多上網(wǎng)。他對(duì)此很不理解。請(qǐng)你給他寫一封回信，要點(diǎn)如下：

1.建議他向媽媽道歉；

2.說(shuō)明過(guò)多上網(wǎng)的危害；

3.列舉一些健康的休閑方式。

注意：(1) 詞數(shù)100左右；

(2) 可適當(dāng)加入細(xì)節(jié)，以使行文連貫；

(3) 開頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)。

Dear Daniel,

I’m very sorry to hear that a conflict occurred between you and your mother because of your Internet addiction.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Yours,

Li Hua

Answer 1

【答案】Dear Daniel,

I’m very sorry to hear that a conflict occurred between you and your mother because of your Internet addiction.

In my opinion, you should apologize to your mother, as she has done nothing wrong to prevent you from Internet addiction. Although the Internet plays an important role in modern life, we can’t ignore its harm to us. Many students spend most of their time playing computer games or chatting aimlessly with others, which may not only result in poor health and decline in study but also loss of communication in the real world.

As students, we should devote our energy to study. When available, you may as well walk outside with your friends or take some exercise to keep fit instead of playing online games. Only in this way can you live and study happily and healthily.

Yours,

Li Hua

【解析】

本篇書面表達(dá)屬于應(yīng)用文，要求寫一封回信。

第1步：根據(jù)提示可知，本篇為一封書信，假設(shè)你是李華，你的加拿大筆友Daniel來(lái)信向你求助。他最近和媽媽鬧矛盾，因?yàn)閶寢尣蛔屗�過(guò)多上網(wǎng)。他對(duì)此很不理解。請(qǐng)你給他寫一封回信，時(shí)態(tài)應(yīng)為一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)。

第2步：根據(jù)寫作要求，確定關(guān)鍵詞（組），如：In my opinion依我看來(lái)，apologize to sb. 向某人道歉，prevent from阻止，play an important role in在……扮演著重要的角色，spend some time (in) doing sth.花費(fèi)一些時(shí)間做某事，not only…but also不僅……而且，keep fit保持（身體）健康， instead of代替 。

第3步：根據(jù)提示及關(guān)鍵詞（組）進(jìn)行遣詞造句，注意主謂一致和時(shí)態(tài)問(wèn)題。

第4步：連句成文，注意使用恰當(dāng)?shù)倪B詞進(jìn)行句子之間的銜接與過(guò)渡，書寫一定要規(guī)范清晰，保持整潔美觀的卷面是非常重要的。

亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明：作者在范文中使用了較多高級(jí)表達(dá)方式，如：Many students spend most of their time playing computer games or chatting aimlessly with others, which may not only result in poor health and decline in study but also loss of communication in the real world.定語(yǔ)從句的運(yùn)用；Only in this way can you live and study happily and healthily.倒裝句的運(yùn)用。本文內(nèi)容完整，語(yǔ)言規(guī)范，語(yǔ)篇連貫，詞數(shù)適當(dāng)。另外全文中沒有中國(guó)式英語(yǔ)的句式，顯示了很高的駕馭英語(yǔ)的能力。另外，文章思路清晰、層次分明，上下句轉(zhuǎn)換自然，為文章增色添彩。