I’ve just got to talk about this problem I’m having with my postman. It all began a year ago, after the birth of his first child. Not wanting to appear rude, I asked him about the baby. The next week, not wanting him to think I had asked out of mere politeness the week before, I asked all about the baby again. Now I can’t break the habit. I freeze whenever I see him coming. The words “How’s the baby?” come out on their own. It holds me up. It holds him up. So why can’t I stop it? The answer is that I want him to like me. Come to think of it, I want everyone to like me.

What about at work? Richard Lawton, a management trainer, warns: “Those managers who are actually liked by most of their staff (員工)are always those who are honest with staff, treating them as human beings and following common politeness like saying hello in the morning.” To explain the point, Richard told the story of the company chairman who especially wanted to be liked. One day, after making one of his employees fired, the employee replied: “If you were that sorry, I wouldn’t be leaving.” The lesson is that if you try too hard to be liked, people won’t like you.

The experts say it all starts in childhood. “If children feel they can only get love from their parents by being good,” says Zelda West-Meads, a marriage adviser, “they develop low self-confidence.” But is there anything wrong in being a giver? Anne Cousins believes there is. “Sometimes giving becomes unhealthy,” she says. “It comes when you do things for others but feel bad about it.”

I am now trying hard to say to people “I feel uncomfortable about saying this, but…” and tell myself “Refusal of a request does not mean Refusal of a person” and I find I can say almost anything to almost anyone.

1.Why does the author ask the postman about his baby?

A. He is interested in the baby.

B. He wants to be always polite to him.

C. He wants to leave a good impression to him.

D. It’s a way to start a chat with great politeness.

2.Managers are more likely to be popular if they ______.

A. help the staff with their problems

B. make sure the staff do not lose their jobs

C. encourage the staff to be polite to each other

D. do not make too much effort to be liked

3.What is the author’s intention of writing this passage?

A. To show how to let others like you more.

B. To encourage people to have more self-confidence.

C. To prove how to create a harmonious atmosphere.

D. To suggest ways of dealing with difficult people.

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刪除：把多余的詞用斜線(\)劃掉。

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We can have conflicts with our important persons like friends, relatives, workmates, etc. But the conflicts doesn’t necessarily mean that the relationship will be destroyed. In fact, sometimes conflict helps people to let out their silent feelings, allowing them to free their suppressed emotions. However, when in a conflict, we usually get angry and say or do things which aren’t linked to the problem at hand. Therefore, it is important that we should try to avoid conflicts through effective communication.

In a heated argument, we usually say things that aren’t related to the real problem, and even use rude words to make sure we gain an advantage over the other person. Then the whole situation goes badly. So we should separate(隔離) the root cause of the problem and build our discussion around it. This ensures that there are no rude remarks and the situation moves in a positive direction.

It’s easy for us to think we’re right and if something isn’t working out, it surely must be someone else’s fault. However, if you aim to solve a conflict, first of all, you should show some respect and allow the other party to express themselves. Using remarks like, “I understand your concern on this” or “I know you’re right at your end”, would make the other person feel more appreciated.

Sometimes some people get too excited and may behave in the wrong way or say something others may not appreciate. This can cause a worse situation. Actually, they should control their emotions and keep calm. This has to be learned through self-control and observing behavior of other people.

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1.What can we learn from Paragraph 1?

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B. Conflicts can improve our relations with others greatly.

C. Effective communication can help us avoid conflicts undoubtedly.

D. The closer two friends are, the more conflicts are between them.

2.When making discussions to solve conflicts, we should ________.

A. know others’ personal quality

B. know others’ ability of expression

C. avoid showing our disadvantages

D. avoid the root cause of the problem

3.The author suggests that when people get too excited, they should ________.

A. behave like other people B. control the situation

C. learn to keep their head D. say something unconcerned

4.In the author’s opinion, how should you deal with those who always want to create trouble for you?

A. Fight with them. B. Ignore them.

C. Have a talk with them. D. Give them something they like.

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