【寫(xiě)作內(nèi)容】
你的筆友George 是英國(guó)某動(dòng)物保護(hù)協(xié)會(huì)的成員,想了解2011年在上海舉辦的動(dòng)物運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì)的情況。請(qǐng)你根據(jù)下表,向他介紹該運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì)的相關(guān)情況。
時(shí)間:2011年9月23日 地點(diǎn):上海野生動(dòng)物園 事件:2011年動(dòng)物運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì)拉開(kāi)帷幕 具體報(bào)道:(1)30多種200余頭世界各地的動(dòng)物參加田徑賽、球賽等項(xiàng)目 (2)觀眾席上座無(wú)虛席,運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì)尤其受小朋友的歡迎 社會(huì)反響:一些動(dòng)物保護(hù)組織表示抗議,認(rèn)為此類運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì)剝奪了動(dòng)物的尊嚴(yán),并對(duì)小朋友有不好的影響。 |
參考詞匯:海野生動(dòng)物園 the Shanghai Animal Park 動(dòng)物運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì) Animal Games
田徑賽 track and field 尊嚴(yán) dignity
【寫(xiě)作要求】只能用5個(gè)句子表達(dá)全部?jī)?nèi)容;信件開(kāi)頭和結(jié)尾已給出,不計(jì)入總句數(shù)。
【評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)】句子結(jié)構(gòu)正確,信息內(nèi)容完整,篇章連貫
Dear George,
I’m glad to have received your letter, in which you require some information about the Shanghai Animal Games. Here are some details about it.
This is all I know about the animal games. I hope this can be of some help to you.
Yours,
WuJie
One possible version:
Dear George,
I ‘m glad to received your letter , in whichi you require some information about the Shanghai Animal Games .Here are some details about it .The Animal Games opened its curtain in the Shanghai Animal Park on September 23,2022. Over 200 animals of more than 30 species from all over the world took part in track and field and ball games .It was so popular with children that there were no vacan/ empty seats during the games .However, it also met with oppositon from animal –protection organizations .They believed such kinds of games took dignity away from animals and would have a negative infuluence on children .This is all I know about the animal games .I hope this can be of some help to you .
Yours,
WuJie
【解析】
試題分析:本篇書(shū)面表達(dá)要求根據(jù)表格內(nèi)容介紹2011年在上海舉辦的動(dòng)物運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì)的情況,內(nèi)容包括時(shí)間,地點(diǎn),事件,報(bào)道內(nèi)容和社會(huì)反響。報(bào)道過(guò)去的事情,要使用一般過(guò)去時(shí)態(tài)和第一人稱。因?yàn)槭且笾荒苡?個(gè)句子表達(dá)全部?jī)?nèi)容,所以在寫(xiě)作時(shí)要盡量使用各種短語(yǔ)和包含信息量大的長(zhǎng)句。比如定語(yǔ)從句,狀語(yǔ)從句,同位語(yǔ)等等。而且要注意保證句子結(jié)構(gòu)正確,要點(diǎn)信息全面。此外還要注意句子與句子之間的銜接,使內(nèi)容流暢,通順?梢允褂玫膮⒖荚~匯:海野生動(dòng)物園 the Shanghai Animal Park 動(dòng)物運(yùn)動(dòng)會(huì) Animal Games田徑賽 track and field 尊嚴(yán) dignity。
【亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明】本篇范文語(yǔ)言流暢自然,要點(diǎn)全面,用五個(gè)句子表達(dá)了所有要求內(nèi)容,很好得完成了寫(xiě)作任務(wù)。在文中作者使用了多種句式結(jié)構(gòu),比如結(jié)果狀語(yǔ)從句It was so popular with children that there were no vacan/ empty seats during the games,賓語(yǔ)從句They believed such kinds of games took dignity away from animals and would have a negative infuluence on children,表語(yǔ)從句This is all I know about the animal games .I hope this can be of some help to you 。而且作者使用了have a negative infuluence on,be of some help to,等高級(jí)詞匯和短語(yǔ),提高了作文檔次。
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