Question

前不久，中央電視臺(tái)報(bào)道了貴州十歲男孩獨(dú)自照顧重病媽媽的故事，引起社會(huì)極大反響。假如你是某校高三學(xué)生李華，請(qǐng)根據(jù)以下要點(diǎn)用英語(yǔ)向某英語(yǔ)報(bào)社寫一封信。1、呼吁社會(huì)愛(ài)心捐助；2、學(xué)會(huì)感恩；3、結(jié)合實(shí)際談?wù)勀愕目捶�。注意�?、信的開(kāi)頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不記入總詞數(shù)；2、可根據(jù)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)適當(dāng)發(fā)揮；詞數(shù)120個(gè)左右。
Dear editor ,
I’m a  student of Senior Three . Not long ago , from CCTV, I learned that a ten-year-old boy in Guizhou was taking care of his seriously sick mother in hospital alone , by which I was deeply moved ….
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Yours sincerely ,
Li Hua

Answer 1

Dear editor ,
I’m a  student of Senior Three . Not long ago , from CCTV, I learned that a ten-year-old boy in Guizhou was taking care of his seriously sick mother in hospital alone , by which I was deeply moved ….
China is a great country and Chinese people think highly of traditional virtues. It is what the child did for his mother that sets us students a good example. First, something should be done for the little boy and his family. We appeal to the whole society to donate money or do something else to help them out of the difficulty. Second, our schools should help to develop the spirit of being grateful to the society,  teachers as well as parents. Last but not least, our government should contitue,  To improve the medical insurance system, especially to support those who are badly in need of medical care.
As students, not only should we work hard at our lessons, but we should be helpful, bear gratitude in mind and overcome difficulties bravely and wisely.
Yours sincerely ,
Li Hua

試題分析：本文是書信類作文，要求就貴州十歲男孩獨(dú)自照顧重病媽媽的故事用英語(yǔ)向某英語(yǔ)報(bào)社寫一封信。文章的要點(diǎn)也基本上都給出來(lái)了，但不是很具體，考生要把要點(diǎn)包括進(jìn)去，不能有遺漏。而且要發(fā)揮自己的想象，充實(shí)內(nèi)容，在寫作的過(guò)程中，要注意使用高級(jí)詞匯和高級(jí)句型，如強(qiáng)調(diào)句，倒裝句等，讓文章更上檔次。同時(shí)在列舉措施的時(shí)候要使用合適的連接詞如：First，second， Besides, What’s more等，讓文章看起來(lái)很有條理，也很流暢。本篇文章在寫作時(shí)不要啰嗦，力求簡(jiǎn)潔。
【亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明】所給范文語(yǔ)言簡(jiǎn)潔，應(yīng)用了一些較好的詞組和句子： think highly of 高度評(píng)價(jià)，in need of需要，bear sth. in mind記住， It is what the child did for his mother that sets us students a good example. 這句話用了主語(yǔ)從句和強(qiáng)調(diào)句， appeal to sb. to do sth呼吁某人做..，as well as 不但…而且， To improve the medical insurance system, especially to support those who are badly in need of medical care.這句話用了定語(yǔ)從句， not only should we work hard at our lessons, but we should be helpful, bear gratitude in mind and overcome difficulties bravely and wisely.這句話用了倒裝句，還有文章使用了 First, Second, Last but not least這樣的關(guān)聯(lián)詞使文章更連貫。